When deflection supersedes reflection

When Deflection Supercedes Reflection
What you wear reflects but also deflects.

There is more to a dress than to refer to it as a clothing or attire. It doesn’t just serve as a cover, it is an aid. Have you ever notice there is a different positive charisma that builds in you when you are all nicely and neatly dressed compared to when you look hastily dressed? This doesn’t apply to your clothes alone, it counts from your hair cut, to your hairstyle or head tie or hijabs, your shoes, socks, nails…. I think this explains why we all prepare so well for an interview, or give all it takes to look nice for a presentation. It just gives you that assurance. Asides from the confidence it gives, it also  defines the way you may be perceived by your audience. While all these are true, it is very important that you don’t make your dressing the sole reason behind your self-confidence, such that the moment you are not looking your best, your confidence diminishes to its barest. What this means is, once your clothing becomes the sole reason behind your self-confidence, it becomes more of a mask for you than an aid. So don’t just try to be comfortable in your clothes but your skin too. If you’ve got objections about this or any additional information, feel free to make comments in the comment box below,  and let’s synthesize.

Yh… we’ve all also heard the cliché, “dress the way you want to be addressed”, “your dress says a lot about you” bla bla bla… Well, these sayings are definitely true. Our dresses and styles reflect a lot about who we are; our occupation, personality, status, religion, occasion and so on. Of course, I would find it hard to believe if you tell me you are a nurse and I constantly see you in a lawyer’s garment. Because, there is obviously no connection between who you say you are and what I see you are. These two have to connect. Once there is a connection between these two, it makes it easier for others to identify with you, makes it easier for them to know the ways to approach you or speak with you.

Despite the important roles clothing plays, it has also been used to manifest deflection. Deflection occurs when we make  certain judgements or conclusions about people based on their appearance or certain obvious characteristics before even approaching them at all.  This is usually as a result of stereotypical stories. You are probably wondering what I mean by stereotypical stories. I will expatiate in Chimamanda’s words. “show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again and that is what they become”. She refers to this as  single story”. The effect of stereotypical stories is the repetition and consistent generalisation, and description of a people which imprint certain beliefs (which may be false or true) in the minds of others. Now you might be wondering, are stories and clothing not two entirely different things? How do these two relates? How exactly does clothing deflect.

A lady got to her study centre and the gate was locked. She wondered what was happening and then saw people crawling beneath the gate just to gain access to the compound. She stood for a while trying to figure out what to do. She thought “would I have to crawl like these people are?” While she was still thinking and trying to figure out  what to do, two Igbo guys walked up to her and said “why can’t you do what others are doing? Are you guys not Boko Haram?” Imagine. How can someone walk up to you to utter such a statement. She has never met these guys before, they didn’t even know her. But because they saw her in a dress and hijab that obviously signifies she is a Muslim, they tagged her as Boko Haram. Why didn’t they tag her as something else? Something more positive. But because of the stereotypical stories that has stamped the notion that terrorists are Muslims, they think everyone in a fully covered dress and hijab is Boko Haram. That’s a ridiculous hasty generalisation that we need to curb. The story I just narrated isn’t a fabricated one. Yes, it happened to a friend of mine. She felt really bad that day that she immediately left the study centre and went back home and didn’t utter a word about it to anyone until after a year. I think it’s really short sighted for anyone to conclude about anyone just because they dress like some people.

I have also fallen a victim of deflection before. It was a really funny experience. I went to local government not too far from my house to get my National Identification Card done. When I got there, I was directed downstairs to purchase a form. Getting there I  met some people there who happened to be there before me. So I just had to wait my turn. I then sat on a bench beside a woman. She immediately asked me to sit somewhere else, code switching English and Yoruba. I just stood and decided to lean on a pillar. She repeated the directive, and I just nodded. Then a man said to her “se ri pe omo Hause leleyi ni, ko le gbo Yoruuba tabi Oyinbo” meaning “can’t you see the lady you are speakin to is Hausa? She cannot understand Yoruba or English”. Then the woman complied, “o to mani” (that is true). So she started to speak to me bits mixing pidgin and little Hausa she thought she understood. Unknowingly to them, I am Yoruba and I speak English fluently. I own a B.A in English for God’s sake. I just smiled and nodded to her again. When it was my turn to purchase the form, I spoke to the attendant in English, making sure the man and the woman were able to hear me and when the attendant responded in Yoruba I switched to Yoruba. I could see the amazement in their faces without even looking at them (lol). The question however is what could have made that man think I am unable to speak English and also made the woman comply without hesitation. No doubt, the stereotypical story that virtually all Hausas are uneducated and therefore incapable of speaking English clouded their sense of judgement. Do not get me wrong, I am not saying the act of inferring is a bad thing, but judging people before even getting to know them?

PS: There are so many features that manifest deflection. But clothing seems to catch my attention because of its complexity.

It’s more like a means to an end.

© Deybola